Dreaming of Edible Paint

I really love to paint. It does wonders for my emotional health. I feel like paint, especially acrylic paint, is the most versatile medium I’ve been exposed to.

Acrylic paint is possibly the safest kind of paint that is easy to acquire, but I do not think it is the best thing for my physical health. I am an extremely messy artist. I will often paint when I have ten minutes to spare, meaning that I will often forget to wash paint off my skin before going on to my next task. Oil paint would be terrible for an artist like myself to use, the fumes make people sick. Even though acrylic isn’t nearly as bad I do not know what the long term effects can be and I really do not like using random chemicals for an activity I find so therapeutic.


Frying the coconut oil with Spinach dye and cornstarch. The Tumeric yellow kind of blended with it.

The idea to make my own paint has been floating around in my head for a while. I wouldn’t have to buy it, the fact that I have to buy it so often is really against my personal philosophy of “fuck money”. I thought it might be fantastic to make paint out of natural materials that would be safe to eat.

This weekend my friend and fellow painter, Piera came to visit me. I told her my idea and we got to work. She taste-tested much of the paint.

I had done a little bit of reading online about making homemade paints. Many of the articles recommended making a tempera type paint out of egg, but I really didn’t want these paints to rot too easily. I read cornstarch and milk would be good ingredients, so I thought we’d try those and go from there. Piera thought we could also try using some kind of oil, especially since we planned to apply heat to some of the materials. We also added coconut oil to our list of ingredients.  Hurray for experimentation.

For pigments I had Red Malabar spinach dye. I had thought turmeric would be great because I cook with turmeric a lot and have a lot of fantastically dyed yellow articles of clothing.

The yellow on the left is how the oily-liquid tumeric turned out.

The water-color like yellow on the left is how the oily-liquid tumeric turned out.The pink-purple on the right is different kinds of paint made from the spinach dye. The red-brown is the paprika.

The first kind we tried was actually somewhat of a success. We created a sort of oil-based yellow ink made from coconut oil, cornstarch and turmeric, we applied this to heat and it came out rather nice. Unfortunately once we waited a few hours it dried a bit and it turned kind of waxy. When I tried to apply it to my painting it didn’t really show up. I wonder if I could have melted it and used it, sort of like encaustic paints? I may try this next time.

We tried again with the turmeric, but this time adding some soy milk and whipping it, sort of like a rue. It came out, well, like a yellow rue. It was slightly clumping and I thought it would not work well, but it turned out to be really fun to use as sort of a thick paste. One of my favorites to play with actually.

Clumpy Tumeric-soy milk paint.

Clumpy Tumeric-soy milk paint.

We tried making the oil based ink with the spinach dye, like we did with the turmeric, but since the dye is water-based it did not want to mix with the oil. Not wanting to waste it, we threw in some soy milk, making a strange pinkish/purple clump. This stuff was meh, not as cool as the yellow.

Orange peel on Piera's painting... Check out the full scale of it on this post.

Orange peel on Piera’s painting “Chrysanthemum” (Fun game.. try to find the orange peel,she painted on it) … I added to it a bit. Check out the full scale of it on this post.

We tried to make paint out of chili pepper and milk, but the chili pepper did not want to release its color. Instead we made a paprika ink, applied to heat. It came out a dark, dark red, almost brown. It led a similar life to ink yellow and turned wax like, but since it was so dark it would look nice when I spread it over a surface.

The Malabar Spinach milk/cornstrach mixture.

The Malabar Spinach milk/cornstrach mixture.

The Spinach dye actually made a fantastic ink on its own, but to make the color a little more solid I put in a bit of soy milk and cornstarch. This was without applying any heat. The cornstarch fell to the bottom and that scrapping the bottom of the container made it came out looking sort of tempera –like, but dried in a pastel sort of way.

At the last minute we found some cranberry and simply mixed that with milk, it was like a light glaze.

My Elephant Painting!

My Elephant Painting!

I painted an elephant. I talk about art as re-arranging things that already existing into something different. Usually I just use materials other people made, the paint, but now I am re-arranging materials into materials that I re-arrange into pictures. Elephants never forget, I do not forget the history of my materials. It was really fun to mold with the thicker paints.

Piera painted a very interesting painting using our “paints” and all kinds of other materials, including an orange peel! She let me add to it the following day.

I plan to continue experimenting. I want to try using this sunflower seed I heard makes a dark purplish ink. I also want to try beets, and perhaps mashed carrots?

Close up on Elephan Painting

Close up on Elephan Painting

I really liked how the cornstarch looked. I read that soap flakes work great with cornstarch and pigment today. I think I will try that soon, but I am going to try and make my own soap first.

I will update ya’ll on how my elephant painting progresses.

Please experiment and let me know what you come up with!

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Art-Sharing Communard

Tip: Click to pictures to open them in new taps for super close-up looks at the art!

I live in an income-sharing community. I am happy to share money, space, food, clothing, and more with many people.

"Chrysanthemum" mostly by Piera Yerkes and some by Belladonna Took Edalow

“Chrysanthemum” mostly by Piera Yerkes and some by Belladonna Took Edalow

"The Circle of Soap" by Belladonna Took Edalow and Piera Yerkes

“The Circle of Soap” by Belladonna Took Edalow and Piera Yerkes

Somewhat recently, it was brought to my attention that I am god awful at sharing artistically.


Close ups of "The Circle of Soap" Close up of “The Circle of Soap”

First, I got into a brief disagreement with someone I live with because they added to a piece I drew on the walls in a public space. I got upset. I think we took about ten minutes to ourselves. I originally did not want to talk about it yet, but then I decided I probably should. I knew I really had no good reason to be upset. This person believed the walls in the space were for public use and was supposed to be a large collaboration. I said that I liked the idea of that, but I had a hard time dealing with it in reality.

Then I was Dungeon Master for a Dungeons and Dragons campaign and someone who was helping me a bit with the technical aspect told me he felt I did not really let him put any of his ideas into the campaign. He said that I seemed a bit possessive of my creative projects.  In this specific instance I was not aware of his desire to collaborate more artistically or maybe I was, but chose to be blind to it. Either way, I realized it was something I needed to think about.

I want to share. Creating is a beautiful thing and I love bringing people together, so why not bring people together using my favorite activity? Arting!

I started by giving the person I had the original disagreement with a painting that they could add to any time they want. I am hoping this will be a back and forth project that could possibly go on for a while.

I decided to paint a collaborative painting with another friend. We were talking a lot about life experiences and what it is like relating to people, so we decided to make that the theme of our collaboration. It ended up being about different stages of a life. We wrote a lot of poetic words on it. The painting shows life stages such as pre-life, the egg coming down from the fallopian tube, the sperm coming to fertilize it, and the spirit world after life.

It was very generous of Piera to let me add to her piece. I was not brave enough to let her add to any of my already started pieces. It is something I am continuously thinking about and working towards.

Belladonna and Piera collaborating quite well.

Belladonna and Piera collaborating quite well.

A Work in Progress.. A Belladonna Took Edalow solo-piece

A Work in Progress.. A Belladonna Took Edalow solo-piece

I use art as therapy and I think it is important for me to have some pieces that I work on solely by myself, pieces that are reflections of my own personal experiences, feelings, and thoughts. However, I am quickly learning it is important to have a balance. I can learn a lot and open up my creative filters more when collaborating with another being.

I highly recommend this thing called collaboration.

Many different close-ups of Chrysanthemum by Piera Yerkes and sort of  Took Edalow (me!)

Close up of Painting IMG_1492 IMG_1491 IMG_1490Close ups of "Chrysanthemum" IMG_1515


 IMG_1487  IMG_1485 IMG_1484

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The Loneliness of a 1990s Born Barbra Streisand Fan

“Well, she really likes Barbra Streisand…”

South Park's "Mecha-Streisand"

South Park’s “Mecha-Streisand”

My friend Piera told her dad when he asked about the person she was visiting.

A classic picture of Ms. Streisand

RANDOM BARBRA FACT: Well, actually, legend..Apparently Barbra Streisand is a huge fan of the pizza place in my old neighborhood called The House Of Calzone.

I am the youngest person I have ever met who enjoys Barbra Streisand to the degree that I do. Some people around my age inform me they enjoy her voice, but many have never heard of her.The other ones who have heard of her are simply familiar with the character of “Mecha-Streisand” in South Park. These sort of Streisandaphobes have let popular culture influence their opinion on my dear Babs. The truth is I have pretty old school tastes when it comes to music and I often feel a lot older when people play music “the kids these days” listen to. I had to specifically request that we “not listen to Derpsterp” (my word for dubstep) the other day while hanging out with a group.I grew up performing with various youth groups, inside and outside of school. Often I was around a bunch of other kids who had ranging obsessions with Musical Theatre. Some of them knew who she was and liked her.

RANDOM BARBRA FACT: Barbra Streisand grew up around Newkirk Ave and Nostrand Ave in Brooklyn, New York.

RANDOM BARBRA FACT: Barbra Streisand grew up around Newkirk Ave and Nostrand Ave in Brooklyn, New York.

If you didn’t know already, Barbra Streisand was a Broadway actress before she did movies. She first played Miss Marmelstein in I can get it for you wholesale. This led to the role that would change her career in Funny Girl. It is a musical about Fanny Brice, the first “ugly” girl in the Ziegfield Follies.

Poster for The Ziegfield Follies-Barbra Streisand covered the song "My Man" in the movie version of Funny Girl and on many albums.

Poster for The Ziegfield Follies-Barbra Streisand covered the song “My Man” in the movie version of Funny Girl and on many albums.

Now I have to explain what that is.. The Ziegfield Follies were huge revues on Broadway that ran for over-twenty years during the early 1900s. They often featured beautiful women and fanciful costumes. Fanny Brice, I actually find rather beautiful, but she was not the classic beauty of time, became sort of the “comic relief” during some of the early years of the show. When Funny Girl was being cast, they were originally going to cast another actress for the role of Fanny, but she was not a singer and planned to talk sing the songs. I can’t remember who, I heard the story long ago, but the person writing the songs

was very upset about their songs be talk-sung and wrote the songs as very difficult to sing. This is when Barbra was brought in. After the show ran it was made into a film that Barbra Streisand won an Oscar for. This was her big break, and from there she went to make many albums (I own almost every album she released on vinyl.) direct, produce, and star in numerous films.  She is a fucking legend and badass multi-talented woman.

barbra looking hot

RANDOM BARBRA FACT: When Barbra sings she breathes between phrases. If you are a classically trained singer you will most likely be taught not to do that. That is one of the reasons Barbra Streisand voice sounds so powerful, she uses a lot of breathe. On her first album the sound designer was editing it so you couldn’t hear her gasps for breathe, Barbra heard it, hated it, made him change it.. the lady knows what she wants.
(Can we take a moment and admire how Barbra looks mad hot in this picture.)

Fanny Brice

Fanny Brice

My interest in theatre led me to audition for Drama Program a local Junior High School provided (Audition for Junior high, what the fuck? I know. I know.). Meaning twice a week I got to take a double period class of theatre. It was pretty incredible, I learned all about Shakespeare, Tennessee Williams(A playwright), Playwrighting, and lots more. I believe I retained the information from that class more than any other class I took during my NYC public school experience.

 For my audition into that program I had to do a monologue. I did a monologue Lucy doesin the musical “You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown”.

The only Barbra Streisand vinyl I do not own. An old friend mocked before and called me and said " I was at a stoopsale and they had the record you wanted, it was three dollars and I didn't buy it." He let me freak out, then said he never saw it.

The only Barbra Streisand vinyl I do not own. An old friend me mocked before and called me and said ” I was at a stoopsale and they had the record you wanted, it was three dollars and I didn’t buy it.” He let me freak out, then said he never saw it.

The monologue was about how Lucy was going to be Queen someday. At some point she talks about how she will shout out to the crowds and my parents recommended I put in the line “I’m the greatest star I am by far, but no one knows it.” They had no idea where they remembered it from, until we looked it up, turned out it was from Funny Girl. We watched it, I liked it, I forgot about it. Later on they bought me the CD from the Broadway show and there was no turning back I loved Barbra Streisand. I was already hooked on showtunes at that point, I would sing Annie at top of my lungs in the living room.

In 7th grade a friend introduced me to the movie Chicago, that was added, and musicals just kept coming. I was obsessed. I was mocked.

I carried this around in my purse. My copy was torn up as fuck.

I carried this around in my purse. My copy was torn up as fuck, very loved.

I can recall a boy who sat at my table saying “Hey, what bands do you like? Oh yea, you don’t you like Barbra Streisand!” That kid is really short and people often thought he was a jerk. Barbra Karma for the win. He also enjoyed chanting “Showtunes Suck” at me. At that point I carried the little CD- case booklets from shows like Rent, Wicked, Hairspray (I now believe I have far more sophisticated tastes in musicals, those shows are quite obnoxious, but they still hold places in my heart… I will probably write more on that later.) I was in drama and some girls I hung out with were in chorus, they liked to tell me that I couldn’t sing. I know that is fucking bullshit. I may not be amazing, but I can sing my ass off.

I never gave up on Barbra and musicals. I auditioned for musicals in high school, but favoritism is alive and well in arts-focused high schools and I was a terrible dancer and a bit shy.

RANDOM BARBRA FACT: Her name is spelled Barbra and not Barbara because at the very beginning of her career she was performing at a nightclub and the newspaper asked her how she spelled her name and she said "Just make sure you spell it wrong".. I think the club had spelled her name wrong on the sign and she rolled with it and that's how she got her name.

RANDOM BARBRA FACT: Her name is spelled Barbra and not Barbara because at the very beginning of her career she was performing at a nightclub and the newspaper asked her how she spelled her name and she said “Just make sure you spell it wrong”.. I think the club had spelled her name wrong on the sign and she rolled with it and that’s how she got her name.

I’ve seen Barbra in concert twice, I remember the most thrilling moment when she ran towards my nose-bleed seats to the right side of the stage during her finale as she sang the Broadway show version of “Don’t rain on my parade(Reprise)” I held binoculars up and cried. I was thirteen, probably one of the youngest people there.

It’s a lonely world, loving Barbra at my age. Plenty of people like musicals, but not the way that I do. I listen to them all the way through, choreograph them in my head, learn to sing high and low so I can play all the roles, think about the characters, become the characters. Study the format of amusical, trends in musicals. I’m hooked, addicted, mad with enthusiasm.  I’ve been working on a straight play for months now, I’ve decided to turn it into a musical, I have one song written.

RANDOM BARBRA FACT: Barbra has an effect named after her. Called the Streisand Effect. Apparently something happened where the media posted something about her she didn't want publicized and made it big deal over it, therefore making it more publicized. When other celebrities/people do that sort of thing it is now called "The Streisand Effect"

RANDOM BARBRA FACT: Barbra has an effect named after her. Called the Streisand Effect. Apparently something happened where the media posted something about her she didn’t want publicized and made it big deal over it, therefore making it more publicized. When other celebrities/people do that sort of thing it is now called “The Streisand Effect”

A couple of years back I thought I was cool for a minute. People I knew all seemed to know the song “Anything Goes” and seemed to be listening to these jazzy songs I like. I really enjoy Ella Fitzgerald, as she covers a lot of Cole Porter songs. He was a showtunes composer.  Then I realized everyone had no concept of the history of that music, they were just playing the video game Fallout 3. The soundtrack from that game features old school songs. I will never be cool.

Even though I took flack, and got called weird, I now know it’s my secret power. No one can ever take that away from me.

A drawing I did of Barbra in high school. She looks like a character from that movie avatar, right?

A drawing I did of Barbra in high school. She looks like a character from that movie avatar, right?

It makes me alive.

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Different Kinds Of Death

Just remember its not real,

Where is the stapling of the pages,

Or the licking of the envelope seal.

Its not a done deal,

Its not real,

Its not real.


Crowds, the masses

Tell you

What you wish was not true,

You knew you knew the sky would become a different shade of blue,

One day one day

Your goodbyes were overdue

Time to start a-new

Chapter seven was over and through.

Now heartbreak shoo shoo shoo.


Missing you,

Which you?

The dead one?

Which kind of setting sun?

The way one’s absract

Leaves their body to rot.

Or the ones that forgot the way they could make my belly quiver and warm,

Like a buzzard swarm,

Their core was ripped and torn.

I’ve sworn I will always care, I will always care.

To the day my memory might be gone and bare,

But until then what do we have to share?

What is left there?

I look into your iris, the one still alive with oxygen,

And stare. I find your glare to be cold,

I remember one day I dreamed we’d grow old,

But on top of your light, it is covered by tar colored mold.

I’m sold on the love, I’m sold on the commitment I made,

To always make you jade tea when you’ve become sick of the unpredicatable sea that is life.

This is why  people these days  never take a wife,

Because even if their bodies are still here,

The thing you admired might disappear.


Death of the inside,

I have to much pride

To give up on the ones I promised.


But what of the ones who promised my body,

Told me they’d care until our bodies got sody

And we decomposed,

We’d become what some called barbarians,

We’d be declothed,

My first reponse is,

Those lucifarians,

How dare they promise and leave,

This is when my nostalgia, my heart, my yellow,

It aches and grieves,

But then I glance at what looks to be a simple leaf.


The patterns,

All stem from one line,

I see this as a sign, that those who’ve have died in anyway,

Bodies gone or changed day by day,

Are connected to me,

The person I used to see has added to the branches of my tree,

I will continue to branch off the line I began,

Each line its own, but a-like,

It grow, the branches ,the patterns into who I will be


Each life that enters,

Possibly unconsciously lends me a piece of their centers.

Our moments together

Can never be severed.

The main channels of my brain television may forget this minor incision,

But the inner-wires have made their decision,

To hold on.


A piece is left in me.

A piece is left in me.

I’ll never forget, I’ll never forget.

I’ll never regret.

It was worth it,

To sit upon your invisible lap and to for maybe just a mill-second,

Fill the hole in my gut.

Even if you’re in a rut, never to climb out, without a doubt, I will do my best,

To call upon the rest,

The best of you in my mind,

Come to your aid with a heart mild-mannered jade smile.

I just wish you’d do the same for me, after its been a while.


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The Terrible Capitalization of Creativity and how to say FUCK DAT SHIT

As I’ve posted before I live on a commune, a commune where I use everyone else’s junk to make art. I usually use this stuff in combination with a variety of expensive art supplies. By most peoples standards I use the cheap kinds of supplies, I buy the .65 cent – 2 dollar craft/acrylic paint from Michael’s and the cheapest largest brush kits I can find. I never buy colored pencils that aren’t the 4 dollar artist loft brand. I straight up don’t use oils, maybe one day soon. I am moving to a room on the commune that has two windows, I will get better ventilation, but I am the type to get paint in my mouth and be too focused to care, this is hardly safe with acrylic, but I won’t die. With oils, even without eating it I might pull a Van Gogh and cut off a body part. My partner would find that so romantic I’m sure.

That supplies is fucking expensive, especially living off the stipend. I don’t have to worry about my basic and even some un-basic necessities (FRESH KALE!!!). The stipend is for luxuries like terrible cereal and art supplies. I’d like to save my money so I can get a decent video camera, or a ukulele. To get decent ones it can be pretty expensive. Pretty DAMN expensive. So I’ve been looking into ways to be creative while spending little to no money, and maybe, you know, fucking the system a bit while doing so. The country wants to charge me to be creative and I say fuck that fucking shit.

I took a trip to Loews to purchase some paints with two of my friends. While I was there I walked around the area where they have those little paint chips. And started taking them in 100’s! All the colors I could possibly think of, there they were, colored paper!All the magnificent possibilities


Postcard- Used mod-podge and cut-out pieces of other paint chip cards to make the image. (got some paint on the corner.. looks kind of cool)

goodthank youcards

Thank you notes!


Back of the thank you notes- advertisements covered with more post-card sized paint chips.


Covering the advertisements with the shipping stickers.

First one, was these fantastic post-card sized ones! I’ve started making postcards out them by gluing on shapes cut out of the other paint chips. I still had to use some pricey materials, I first tried to use Elmer’s Glue, but it dried kind of ugly. Then I tried using simply mod-podge and it came out a lot  nicer. I also tried painting the stupid advertisements on the back, that kind of worked. I tried a few other methods that seemed to work better. One was gluing a whole other card to back.  I made funky thank-you notes for people who’d helped on the commune.

We use a postage meter that prints postage onto these little stickers that we then put on out packages. That is another way I have covered the advertisement, using the blank stickers.

Many wonderful people have been helping us repair our main building post-arson and I have been making them thank you cards with the paint chips. I figured it was fitting because one of the main jobs was re-painting the walls. It sort of goes with the theme.

I have also been using the papers to paint furniture for one of my fellow communards! Not completely finished yet, but SOON. (And then I will post pictures of the multiple pieces of furniture I’ve been painting.)

top of furniture

Sort of Ganesh inspired. The center of the flower is made out of cut outs from the paint chips

I would also like to say that I would gladly send a free post card to anyone who wants one. Please email me at merdeyisnotamermaid@gmail.com if you would be interested. I promise I won’t do anything else with your address.. Its up to you!

leg furniture

The leg of the furniture. Flower made out of paint chip cut-ou

flower furniture

Close up on the flower.

Thanks for reading friends.

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RANDOM SHIT (the life of a packrat artist in community)

Paxus has been asking me to write this for a while.

What is it like to be an artist living in community?

I should first state that I live in an intentional community, or commune, as the out of the know folks call it. Here I must work 42 hours a week doing various tasks. Generally, I answer phones calls from customers with thick accents insisting that “send ’em their dam sweet potatoes” and that I gladly do. Proving that I am more organized than I would generally appear to be.

In this wonderful place I am allowed to live in chaos in my room. I am one of those disgusting pack-artists that needs to save everything. I am a stage 0.01 hoarder.



The Tape Monster!

My partner asked “why do you need this? It looks like garbage. ”

“Why wouldn’t I need it?!” I replied. “I could do so many things with it!”

An Explanation: My fellow communard and friend, Paxus asked me to paint the Post Office for the regional Burn Transformus. This lovely ball of color and dirt was a result of my artistic process. When I thought the Post Office needing some quick jazzing up as the deadline approached, I decided to put masking tape arranged as stripes on the Post Office.  I then painted on the tape and took the tape off once the paint was dry (Yay for my best friend acrylic paint being a master at fast-drying).Even though the tape had done its job, it was no longer needed. I thought the colored tape looked really pretty, especially because I used splatter paint against some of the tape. I figured I could glue it to later pieces or use it to make jewelry, either way I have an eventual plan.

The best thing for a hoarding artist living in community is the fact that, even though you have a private space, you are basically living amongst other peoples shit. Random shit current members, past members, interns, fucking guests that were here for a single day, left lying around. Often times if there is no piece of masking tape with a name on it, it is fair game and becomes commie. (commie= communal AKA for anyone.) I love using random shit in my art. I’ve been living here for about nine months and now the other humans living here KNOW I will take their garbage.


Cup filled with shards from a broken mirror.

Cup filled with shards from a broken mirror.

A work in progress using the shards!

clay faces A work in progress using the shards!

EXPLANATION: A few months ago one of    my dear friends left, a provisional member. One of our longer term member’s daughter was going to move into his room. She decided to go take a look and see what his room looked like. She was DISGUSTED at the state of the room. He had left a bunch of his stuff that she now was left to clean up. Much to my excitement she let me look through the bags of trash before she threw it out. I found a variety of tiny containers, Broken MP3 players and a bunch of CDs I’ll never listen to. He was also an artist and had some paint. Probably the best find was the broken mirror that he’d never chosen to clean up. This angered our current mother member, but I was thrilled that I had a broken mirror to mess around with. I’ve had it since three months ago, but the other day I finally decided to break it up into even smaller pieces so I could use it for a work-in-progress. It is such a work in progress that I now have a mug filled with shards of mirror in my room waiting to be glued.


Big Ol' Bucket of Hair!

Big Ol’ Bucket of Hair!

Young women come here often and learn that they can tell societies beauty standards to go fuck themselves. This usually begins with them getting some sort of hawk, or shaving a part of their head. This one girl very awesomely shaved her entire head and she had LONG TUROQUOISE HAIR that she donated to my random shit collection. I walked around the entire day saying to anybody who’d listen (some probably didn’t want to.) “this is the most exciting day of my life.”

Her hair has gone to be part of my most “almost completed” painting of the moment and to be accessories for my lovely mannequin heads hair! It will probably be the best part of many other pieces I will create!

manichin-headelvan lady

the non-writing pens

the non-writing pens

Lets not forget how awesome it is that there is a fuckton of construction going on the commune right now. LOTS of scrap wood! In fact, both pieces sampled in this post are done on such surfaces.

The other day, someone tried to give me super fine-tip pens.. more traditional art supplies and they didn’t even work.. I’ll find something to make them into I am sure.

I don’t just paint! I am also making a mockumentary, to be posted on indiegogo soon!

Much love and to the fellow communards readings.. GIVE ME YOUR RANDOM SHIT! Or your hair.. or your toenails!

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The Media and Psychology Of Chosen Oneism

If you read my earlier post  Jesus Impersonator’s, Siddhartha’s Reincarnate, and The American Epidemic of Chosen Oneism you will find my rant on the symptoms of Chosen Oneism. The psychological epidemic of believing you are the Messiah, or somewhat spiritually superior to everyone else. Here I will rant about some more of psychological theories.

Its possible these modern-messianic practitioners came out of the womb simply craving approval. I think we all do, this is America. However, I think there is more to it than just that and the twitter-factor. Video-Games. Super awesome in my opinion. More engaging for some people and that is wonderful. The newest Elder Scrolls game, Skyrim, is a fantastic piece of art. Someone once told me that “true art”(fuck that term) is characterized by its ability to say something about the time period it was made in. Skyrim came out a little bit after the whole Occupy Wall Street ordeal and what is Skyrim about? Power struggle, at least from my understanding. Now that I’ve given video games their stamp of artistic approval I can tell you how they have contributed to our psychological epidemic.

Like I said before, video games are extremely engaging! In most Role-Play Games that I’ve played you’re generally a single character with an extremely important quest to complete. In fact you, yourself are the “special” in someway. YOU are needed to save all the other characters from a post-apocalyptic disaster, infestation of murderous mythical creatures, etc.  You usually have all kind of tools or magic to aid you. They come complete with dramatic Matrix-like cut-scenes. Here the very blue-pill(typical) lines come out of the “chosen ones” mouth in the scene where they discover they special “how do you know my name?”, ” B-b-but, what could I do to save everyone from the dragon?”. Usually some other character, often a wise old Dumbledore-type gives you equally as cliche answers and words of encouragement. These games are easy to get addicted to for a little while… or a very long while. When Skyrim came out many people I know did not leave their house for months, understandably of course.

Now here is where the problem lies, kids be fucking crazy these days or they are just kids until….. Parents have their kids on meth and all kinds of SRI’s from the second they have a single feeling or thought that is not inside the box. We have no idea how these substances effect their brains, fuck we don’t even know how the serotonin naturally made in our brains work. How the hell would we understand shit about how a child’s developing brain would be effected by psycho-pharmaceuticals? In case you didn’t get it, we don’t understand in the slightest. Then when our kids try to ask us questions about real- life we can’t deal with it because we forgot to take our Prozac this morning. How do we solve such an issue? We put them in front a computer to discover the world of pornography and video games. A child, on drugs and with no real guidance is bad news. HEY HONEY I’VE GOT A GREAT IDEA, lets put them in front of a fake universe where they can be shamans, wizards, and all kind of magical beings. That is fucking awesome, imagination is a really positive thing! However, when someones primary social life exists on World of Warcraft its got to fuck with their perception of the non-computer world. Especially when we fast forward to adult teen years/early twenties. They’ve been more present in the warcraft world since they were small and they’ve just begun to make new friends and their friend sticks a tab of acid on their tongue.

With LSD comes great responsibility. No, more like abstract ideas about philosophy, often leading to some sort of eastern religion or magical thinking. Now lets combine that with the  years of other random drugs and fake world’s where they are the chosen-ones. I see a potential result of Chosen-Oneism and we didn’t even include facebook in that equation. This is just my theory and what I’ve noticed about many of the people I would say behave as though they are spiritually superior.

The main issue I have with all of this, is that although I like to keep it under wraps I am a tad bit spiritual. I believe that ALL people have the ability to be empathic or highly intuitive and to get in touch with a higher part of themselves. Be connected to nature, all that lovely stuff. Part of my spirituality is the belief that no one is superior to one another. Some people are just more susceptible to certain strengths, but all of us have the abilities and purpose. I am very turned-off by the egotistical tendencies of many spiritual people I’ve met.  I do have to say I am grateful for the characters with chosen-oneism I have met. I do not think I would have reached the place I am in my life spiritually without them. It showed me exactly what I do not want to do. I of course still might know nothing at all, because I am superior to no one and that includes them. They have value too.

I’ve got some great tales about some of the Charles Manson contemporaries. More stories to come.

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